Taking The Steps to Healthy

       

        In the last 4 months, my priorities have changed. I don't do for me anymore, I do for Jake, and that's why I need to take a long look at how I take care of myself, for my son. We'll get into that a little more later in the post, right now I'm going to get into why my mortality is becoming something that I'm thinking of.

        In just over a month, I will be older than my mom. That is a super weird sentence right, but my mom never saw her 32nd birthday, so there is that. I have found myself just grieving for her lately, not about her being gone, that will never go away, but actually in pain for HER. What she missed, and what she knew she was going to miss, it kills me now because I couldn't imagine not being there for Jake. Not that my mother taking care of herself better would have changed her fate, but it could have for my father.

       In my head my dad was invincible, and STILL he went way earlier than he should have and I feel pain for him, because he's missing his grandson, and he SO wanted to be a grandfather. The health issues that took my father, could potentially get to me, but THOSE I can fight.

      I would like to get away from the grim part of this post at this point, I need to start focusing on taking better care of myself. After my pregnancy the weight dropped off me, but suddenly all the food restrictions were lifted, while exercise ones were implemented. I'm back to my pregnancy weight, which isn't horrible because in my pregnancy, I only gained 15lbs, but it has be saying "enough is enough".

      I don't actually want to focus on the scale though. I only look at it because I'm well over where I should be. I want to be healthier so I can keep up with Jake, and be there  for him when he needs me. The other thing I need to be careful of is how quickly I lose weight because I'm still breastfeeding, and dropping TOO quickly, or not taking in ENOUGH calories, it could seriously harm my supply.

      So I'm taking it slow, with a walk daily with Jake. A little bit of weight training as well. As far as diet goes, I'm focusing on foods that help boost milk supply. These are still healthy foods, they're nutrient dense, and maybe they won't cut the calories as quickly as some other foods, but they're what I need to do, for now.

     So while I feel like this will be more of a personal journey, this post is acting as, well my personal declaration to tackle this, not even for me, for Jake

       K, luv ya, Bye

       Nancy