Date Night

       

         Can I just say how ridiculous the price of going to the movies is? I remember being told how crazy it was when I was a kid...but if I had $10, I got in and got my large refillable popcorn. That doesn't cover my ticket now. This said, between my scene points, and a Christmas gift card, we saw Captain Marvel last night and had a medium pop and a small popcorn. Why is this blog worthy? Well for one, I haven't blogged in a while. Between going back to work and Jake's first Birthday party, blogging has disappeared a tad. The second reason, Cale and I got our first date since Jake was born. Our last one was just before he was born and we saw Black Panther.

         Captain Marvel was awesome  and the soundtrack was a huge dose of nostalgia, especially if you were a girl in the 90's. My Brother and Sister in-law have been visiting, and stayed with and put Jake to bed last night (first time anyone outside of us has done bedtime) and in true Jake fashion, everything was fine. Makes me hope we don't go another year before another date night.

A Morning Routine

     

           A week from today I return to work, and I'm attempting to get myself into a routine. Long gone are the days of getting up a half hour before I have to leave. I may have mentioned I was trying before, but honestly I had more desire to sleep than get up and get ready, so I 100% spent days in my pajamas. Today however I reminded myself of when I used to cover the morning show at the radio station and how I needed a week to get used to this. So after laying in bed wanting to go back to sleep after my alarm, I got my butt out of bed.

          I did zero of my night before prep work that I 100% intend to do to make my life easier when I go back, which is part of why I'm focused on just me today...in the coming weeks, Jake will be up at this point (7am). What sucks SO much is he used to always get up at 6am, and then in the last month, he started sleeping past 7:30. I did 3 years of high school where I was supposed to be up at 6, and it was a struggle every day for 3 years...who knew having a kid could get me used to a 6am alarm...and now he sleeps in later than me. Honestly though I'm thankful for the consistency, because I feel more comfortable when I'm on a routine.

       This morning I was able to workout, get makeup and hair done get dressed and have a HOT coffee...that doesn't happen.

        The sleeping prince wakes early today! Gotta go!

        K, Luv Ya, Bye!

         Nancy

Mom Shame and Unsolicited Advice

   

So yesterday, I think I was mom shamed...or at the very least, I was dealing with a troll. I commented on a friend of mine's post, where they were excited they were able to nurse longer with their second child than their first. This is a big deal, and anyone who has ever nursed, long or short term, know this. If you have seen any of my posts recently, you know I'm headed back to work soon, and Jake is weaned. I shared this, because that's what we moms do, share our experiences...

       Suddenly it was pointed out to me, I absolutely could have continued nursing, just when I was home. So for me, this seems a little chaotic, and Jake is thriving with solids. Keeping that going, the cons outweigh the pros, for me anyway. But it became this back and forth, which I eventually just stopped bothering to reply to. Instead I messaged the person who did the orginal post, and apologized that this back and forth was taking away from her accomplishments.

         Here is what we all need to remember, unsolicited advice to a mom, if it's actually mom shaming or not, is typically not taken well. I know I have on more than one occasion gotten angry because some one told me how to do something with Jake, when I never asked for input. As moms we can be defensive of our parenting. If it's meant maliciously or not, it can come off as an attack.

       Pretty sure I did a post lla while back on mom shaming, so not delving into that today. Just remember, yes  moms have a lot of questions...but we need to wait for the question, before we give an answer.

         K, Luv Ya, Bye!

Book Report #1 Lena Dunham's, Not that Kind of Girl

       

  I decided when I finished my books I would do a book report here on my blog. Prior to going out and purchasing new additions to my library, I had a look at what I already owned and had committed to reading. So the first book was Lena Dunham's not that kind of girl, and I should have read it when I bought it. It's the kind of book I would recommend to a 22 year old who goes out on the weekends, not so much a 32 year old whose idea of a great Saturday night includes pajamas. The book was well written, I enjoy the way Lena Dunham speaks, and would love to read a book she would write now, but some of the stuff I had to wade through, made me not miss being in my 20's at all.

         That being said there were topics brought up, that in today's post Harvey Weinstein scandal society, that would probably not have been treated so casually, and some things celebrated more.

         I found the chapters on sexual discovery vulgar, and cringed realizing how old I've gotten, because that 22 year old inside me would have gobbled it up and not batted an eye.

          My verdict, as the box progressed and our narrator grew, I felt more at home, less like I was watching a somewhat cautionary tale. I wouldn't recommend this to my friend down the street, but maybe to her younger cousin fresh out of high school.

        K, Luv Ya, Bye!

        Nancy

Why I didn't Wait...

         

          So I guess the typical norm when you get pregnant is to wait 12 weeks to announce the pregnancy, in case you lose the baby. Well making it Facebook official, we did wait, and we SORT OF waited a bit with others, not because we meant to, but because I was further along than we thought. But I feel like the logic behind "don't tell, because you might lose the baby", is seriously flawed. I don't mean to stomp on you if that's what you were comfortable doing, but I don't know that I could have. I told work right away, so they would understand if I had to run off the floor to be sick ( luckily I only got sick a couple times), or something happened, and I did have to go to the hospital within what I THOUGHT was the first 4 weeks (it was actually like 8).

           I love to start this story with, do you remember the big phone outage in the summer of 2017? Two thirds of the providers in Atlantic canada were down, and I don't just mean cell phones, land lines too...that's the day I was at work and worried I was having a miscarriage. Luckily, I work across the parking lot from where Cale works. They tend to move a little faster at the hospital when you say "I'm pregnant" (faster when they see the evidence, and if you say "i'm going to labour and delivery, you jump to the front of the line).

            Needless to say, I didn't have a miscarriage, what's more they got my first appointment moved up, AND brought in a cheapy ultrasound machine (in comparison only I'm sure), and told me where we were we probably wouldn't see anything. This is where we found out I was further along because I fought back tears when I saw his little heartbeat (I actually cried when I heard it the first time).

             So here is why I told people. If we'd gone in and they said, "yup, you lost the baby", that would have devastated me. It seems all too often society tells us to suffer in silence, and for some  maybe that works. But we've also started shining a light on why it really doesn't too. I couldn't have suffered in silence. I can't say for sure what the extent of the damage would've been, but it would have been bad. This is why, even if I had 15 kids, I wouldn't keep it quiet. I would tell people, quietly, and my way before it was broadcast for all to see on Facebook, but I would share it.

         K, Luv Ya, Bye

         Nancy

To Be there for Jake, I have to work on Me!

         

Getting my Super suit ready 

          All routines have to start somewhere right? I am weeks away from returning to work, and routine seems to be the buzz word around here. I've always tried for something resembling a routine with Jake, but it's always had to be flexible, because the first year has so many wenches it can throw in the works. However the last couple weeks has basically all been about getting us ready for when I go back to work. Most of the focus has been on Jake, when in reality, both Cale and I have some adjustments too. 

          I took a step back the other night and thought, what do I want MY life to look like when I return to work? Looking at myself isn't really something I have been doing in the last 10 months. I have always covered Jake, and when there was time I would shower, or eat, or get dressed. Somehow I don't see work being okay with me showing up in the sweats I put on two days ago, and my hair looking like...well how it did a couple days ago.

          So I evaluated, and one thing I want is to be able to work during the day, and come home and spend my evening with Jake. On days I work, I'm going to see him for about 4 hours...I'd like the time to be quality. For my energy to go up, I have to do something I have neglected for months and take better care of myself. Pleased to say in the last week, I have exercised 4 out of 6 days (the other 2 I was in recovery). The problem is it was mostly during naps...I won't be home for naps...yesterday I got up an hour before I would need to get Jake out of bed on a work day. I got up, exercised, and got myself almost completely ready before getting him out of bed, and it worked SO well. Jake has (knock on wood) started sleeping in later, so his former wake up time of 6am (which I used to struggle with), is the perfect time to get my day started. I still have a little time but, it's all becoming more real, because I've been chatting with work about my return far more frequently here lately.

Reading List Challenge

           

How fair is it? I'm weeks away from returning to work  and I'm just figuring out time management?! I have been thinking on how to keep up my self care habits when I go back to work, so we'll see. I got to thinking today though, I'm working on developments I  several aspects, but I haven't focused a lot on personal development. I actually really enjoy reading...but I can't seem to remember the last book I read cover to cover...I expect it was a walking dead comic... so I took to pinterest and made myself a reading list board. I thought one a month was possible...here is what I came up with.

1. Not that kind of girl by Lena Dunham...honestly my first stop was my bookshelf, and this is an incomplete in my collection. This spoke to me as a 20 something, but i don't know what I'll take away from it as a 32 year old...we'll see.

2. Yes Please by Amy Poehler. This is another incomplete on my shelf, but I feel like it will still be relevant. I love Amy Poehler, she speaks to me so I'm looking forward to it.

3. You Are a Badass by Jen Scincero. I bought this as an ibook a couple years ago, and started reading it during my breaks at work. I just seem to work better with hard copy book. I absorb them better...also I'm android now...so

4. Eat that Frog by Brian Tracy. So I heard about this one from my favorite youtuber, and then it popped up in my book search too, so it found it's way to my list.

5. Radical Self Love by Gala Darling. This was on my search and jumped out at me because I used to check out Gala Darling's website all the time. She has such a wonderful way about her. I remember when she released this book...add to list.

6. Kind is the new Classy by Candice Cameron Bure...perhaps I'm still working the Hallmark Christmas specials out my system, it could also be my Full House nostalgia, but this one is on my list. She as a person fascinates me. I may not agree with everything she publicly speaks on, but I dig hearing what she has to say.

7. Grace Not Perfection by Emily Ley. In a world that seems to demand perfection from us as a people, the title alone spoke to  me...the hot pink cover popped out ( I wonder if that was on purpose)

8. How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind by Dana k White. Even when I am on top of everything in my home, I feel like either something is secretly lurking behind a closed door....or everything is about to topple over...yup, sounds good.

9. Start where You Are by Meera Lee Patel. So this is actually an journaling concept book, and I blog, I make lists, I keep notebooks. Journaling seems like a great fit, and prompted journaling makes you dig a little deeper

10. Adventures for your Soul by Shannon Kaiser. This is another one that gets you to take a deeper look at yourself.

11. The Universe Has Your Back by Gabrielle Bernstein. I think it's safe to say that at some point or another, most of us have believed the opposite to be true. The book is said to help you let go of fear of the unknown...which personally can keep me up at night.

12. The Princess Diariest by Carrie Fisher. While I feel like this book requires no explanation...I also feel like I could give the greatest explanation for this one. I love Star Wars and Princess Leia is my Disney Princess. To this day, my heart breaks knowing Carrie Fisher is no longer in this world. She was outspoken, strong and had a wonderful sense of humor.

        So that's my list. I challenge you to make your own. Pinterest is a great resource for finding the types of books that might speak to you, and to save them for you for the next time you're wondering what to read.

        K, Luv Ya, Bye!
        Nacy